How much is enough?

Let’s talk about contentment today. Have you ever thought about how much is enough? If you think about every one of us doing better than where we thought we would be. Even then we are on this race for more. We want just a little bit more. More money, more prestige, more pizza, more travel, more TV, more computer game, and whatnot. Have we ever contemplated how much is enough? We must realize that it is a moving target. I remember when I was in college, they used to pay me a $900 per month stipend and tuition waiver. I thought I was on top of my world! Not only I was driving a brand new car but had some money left over at the end of the month. Fast forward 30 years and $900 may not cover a day on occasion. So what happened? We kept wanting more and as we received more, our needs kept increasing. This is what we need to realize. There is never enough unless you are content within yourself. I have everything that I need at this moment. You may have heard the story of a Mexican fisherman. A wall street executive takes a vacation in a small town in Mexico. He notices that fishermen go out every morning and return with fish by early afternoon. They cook the fish and then have beer and dance the night out. This was their daily routine. Wall Street guy sits down the fisherman and says you know I can make you big. He says how so? Wall Street guy says we can get you a loan to get a couple of boats where you can catch more fish and sell it to the town next door. Fisherman asks what next? He replies well then we buy some more boats and sell the fish to the City. Fisherman asks then what? He says then we buy a fleet of 100+ boats and make you the biggest fishing operation in Mexico. Fisherman asks then what? He says then we do an IPO and you cash out and retire. The fisherman asks what was next? Wall Street guy says then you can retire in a small town and wake when you want, go to sea catch some fish, have a beer, and party the night out. The fisherman says I am already doing it! So you see sometimes what we are chasing is right in front of us. Just with a little bit of contentment, we can get what we want without chasing for it.

So in meditation today, we will settle down in our hearts. Then we will contemplate do we really need more? After contemplation, we will make a determination I am where I am supposed to be. I have what I need for this moment. We will than hold that determination.

Kindness of others

Let’s talk about the kindness of others. If you look at every day so many people are doing so much work just to keep us happy. Think about that, you want groceries. You order it from Amazon. Well, it started out with someone farming the groceries that you want. It goes then to a wholesaler and the distributor and so on. Just to bring tomatoes to your door, more than 25 people have done their part at least. Now you may say well I paid for the tomatoes and they all got paid. True. But they did not have to do those tasks. They could as well have done something else. How did you get money to pay for all this? Someone had to give you a job. You may say, I am good at what I do. Sure you are. Someone gave you those instructions. You paid for your tuition – someone had to give you that money. So if you think long and hard, you will notice that everything we enjoy, a lot of people who we don’t even think about play a role. We must appreciate the kindness of other beings. In our meditation, we will try and contemplate these points and towards the end, we will develop affection towards all beings. This is the focus of our meditation.

What if someone is trying to provoke you to get you angry?

Excellent question. When someone tries to provoke us, we should try and figure our what it is that provokes us. If two people say the same thing to us, one will provoke us and other will not. Why is that? That’s because of our attachment towards that person. This is self-cherishing. As your meditation practice grows, thing that bother you will no longer bother you. And eventually, they will realize that it does not bother you and stop trying to provoke you.

What if you are trying to help someone and they don’t get it that makes you angry? Where does self-cherishing come in this case?

That is a great question. Let’s say for example, you give some money to a homeless person to get some food. They turn around and buy liquor or cigarettes with that money. If that happens you get angry because you think they are not conforming to your values. You have attachment towards the money you just gave them – which arises out of self-cherishing. So in this case even though you are trying to help someone, your anger towards them is due to your self-cherishing.

Self-cherishing

Let’s talk about delusions today. There are six so-called root delusions – anger, attachment, ignorance, pride, doubt, and wrong views. If you think about it, delusions are the reason for our day to day unhappiness. Someone offends us in some way, and we get angry. We have high expectations from our friends and family due to attachment. So, on and so forth. Have you ever stopped to think about where these delusions come from? Why do we get angry or jealous? The root cause of all our delusions is self-cherishing. Self-cherishing is a mind that thinks “I am important”. Think about it. We have a conversation with someone, and they say something that hurts our pride. Why does that hurt our pride?   That is because we think we are more important than other person. We can apply the same logic on all of our delusions. For example, someone on your staff did not complete their task on time and you got angry. Well you got angry because that makes you look bad – you promised your client or your superior that task would be complete on certain date. So your anger is out of your self-cherishing and has nothing to do with the project itself. So we should try and contemplate during our mediation that all of our problems arise from self-cherishing. I must eliminate self-cherishing.