I recently read a statement from Sadhguru that goes something like try to create a happy life and not the lifestyle. I thought that was such an interesting point that we decided to dedicate our entire episode today to Life vs Lifestyle.
Before we continue though let’s look into what I mean by that and what is the distinction between the two. Life as we all know is our day-to-day living. Things we do every day from the moment we wake up to the time we go to sleep. Lifestyle on the other hand is mostly material things that we tend to gather or are looking to gather. Now, this also includes services and experiences so material things is a loose term here.
Most people today are trying to improve their lifestyle. And there is nothing wrong with that. There are billions of people on this planet for whom food on the table is a question mark. For them, lifestyle is extremely important. For some of them, there is no distinction quite frankly. But the rest of us for whom the food on the table is taken care of, we need to start focusing more on the life we are living today as opposed to the lifestyle that we are after. So many people are trying to get just a little bigger house, or a nicer car, or a better job, and on and on. But in going after that lifestyle, if you forget to live, that is where the disconnect happens.
We think about some future version of ourselves so many times a day but how many times a day do we check inside of ourselves to see if we are happy at that moment? When we are chasing a lifestyle, we are essentially predefining what “success” may look like. But instead, if we enjoy everything that life throws at us, we will make the most out of here and now. When we focus on the here and now, life becomes wonderful. You see, it is our focus on the past and the future that makes us miserable. I think I read somewhere that our mind always wants to dwell on the past or dream about the future. Lifestyle is mostly about dreaming about the future. Instead, let’s just enjoy what we have right in front of us. Enjoy being with your kids. Spend time helping them with homework. Go on a date night with your significant other. Fall in love all over again. There is so much joy in just being with people you love.
One thing I have learned over the years is that whenever I tried to chase something, it always kept running from it. It was when I never expected something, that things showed up in my life. Call it the right place at right time or call it Karma, but I have come to believe that chasing never worked for me. It is like the saying goes, stop trying so hard. If it is meant to be, it will happen.
Now that does not mean that you just give up on life. The exact opposite of that. Give 100% to whatever you do. But more importantly, enjoy every activity. If the activity does not bring you joy, time to find something else to do. Also though don’t expect any pre-determined outcomes. When we have a preconception of what the results should look like, that’s when things disappoint us.
How many people do you know that are chasing someone else’s dream? Everyone it appears is running after the same thing without knowing why and what they are chasing. It feels like a herd sometimes. I see this in Indian parents a lot. They all are working so hard to make sure that their kids will inherit a million dollars each. What is that about? I keep telling them, to do what’s right for them. Of course, give your kids the best education but beyond that, they have their Karma. Even if you give them a million dollars, if it is not in their Karma, they will lose it in a heart bit. So don’t chase for the sake of your kids. They would rather you go to every one of their games or the recitals.
I have heard this a lot, I am working towards security. No such thing my friends. Security is an illusion. You are secure if you think you are secure. It’s as simple as that. I know people who don’t feel financially secure with millions of dollars in their bank accounts.
I read something interesting while researching for this episode. The lottery industry makes $73 billion a year not because people love their life! Think about it. The richest country in human civilization and we spend that much money on lottery tickets! All because we want to chase that lifestyle.
Friends, do me a favor and make a habit of looking inside a few times a day. The best way to do this is to take some deep breaths. When we take a deep breath, we are able to check what is going on within ourselves. Put a smile on your face while you are at it. It does wonder for your health and your well-being.